Pregnant women are often really irritable. People often blame the hormones specifically on gonadotropin. But in fact, such a nervous state can be explained not only with physiological reasons: future mothers are worried about their children and because they truly understand how big the responsibility is, they’re under immense stress. So, any seemingly harmless phrase people say can lead to very deep problems.
We at Bright Side decided to make pregnant women’s lives simpler and made a list of phrases that should not be used in the presence of a future mother.
All kinds of prohibitions
In general, people don’t like prohibitions, and if we’re talking about pregnant women, it’s a special case. Pregnant women know better than anyone else what she can do and what she can’t because their doctors have already informed them about this. If you’re not a doctor, don’t give silly advice because you can do more harm than good.
Reminders that they shouldn’t be nervous
Seriously? Then why do you have to say these words? Pregnant women are destined to be worried because they want their future baby to be healthy. And besides, they are experiencing a hormonal imbalance in their bodies. So, if you want to make their lives easier, just avoid saying such words; they can only do the opposite of what you intended.
“Pregnancy is not an illness.”
If so, why do we “diagnose” pregnancy? Yes, expecting a baby is a happy thing but it’s still a lot of work for the body that comes at a cost.
Impolite questions about their reproductive health
This is probably the most impolite question you could ask a pregnant woman. In other words, people are asking if a woman is able to get pregnant. Surprisingly, not all people are ready to discuss their reproductive health with everyone and for some people, this may be a painful subject.
“Oh, you have such a big belly!”
Usually, after people say this, they try to touch the belly. Please, if you are not a close relative of the future baby, don’t do this! Women have a so-called maternal instinct and they don’t like other people being so close to her children. And yes, she knows about the size of her belly, there’s no need to tell her about this again. This can be really irritating. The best thing you can do is help her because it may be difficult for her to move.
“When I was pregnant…”
It’s even worse if this phrase is followed by something like, “When I was pregnant, my belly was…” Pregnant women are really worried about their babies so they might think that there is something wrong with them. Even if a future mother is sure her baby is perfectly fine, this comparison is really irritating and can make her feel as if her pregnancy is worse than someone else’s.
“Do you need baby clothes? I have some left.”
You should be really careful when trying to offer help like this. Quite often, especially if it’s their first pregnancy, mothers prefer buying new clothes for their children and choosing stores by themselves. If this is the case, remember that your generous offer can be taken as an attempt to get rid of the stuff you don’t need.
Predictions of the future baby’s sex
“Oh, really? Then why did I spend all that time taking ultrasound scans? I should have asked the expert right away!” In fact, when you can see a belly even a little, you can find out the sex. So, most mothers already know the sex of their baby. It’s especially funny when people trying to predict the sex are wrong.
Questions about names
This question can only be asked by close friends and relatives. If you are not the closest person to the pregnant woman, you shouldn’t ask such things because it’s a really personal thing. Some people prefer not to share their ideas for names because they’re superstitious. And even if you think this is a silly thing, you should respect it.
“You want to go on maternity leave as soon as possible?”
This sounds like you think she doesn’t do her job well. If it’s true, just tell her. If she is a good employee and doesn’t cause any trouble, then why ask this question?
“You probably want some salty foods.”
No, she wants people to stop asking her this ridiculous question! Don’t spread the myths about the special tastes pregnant women have: in most cases, they’re just a little more hungry than usual. More than that, they can’t eat salty foods because it’s a lot of work for their kidneys.
Bonus: Even after your baby is born, you will still hear phrases — some of which are even more annoying.
Have you ever heard any other seemingly harmless phrases said to a pregnant woman? Tell us in the comment section below.
Illustrated by Yekaterina Ragozina for BrightSide.me